I've talked to a few men on the two dating sites I'm on, and have met a few in person that made it that far with my interest. As of today, no connection. In this journey I'm wondering if I have been out of the dating pool so long that men have changed or have I changed so much that I find the pool very limited in potential prospects.
My profile on those sites are the same with the same very PG pics. I'm not overly dominant sounding on them, but there are undertones that one who is inclined towards D/s and looking for a strong female partner will see that shining through. It attracts those who are submissive, those who want to try and those who are attracted to strong women in general. I decided to not be blatant because I want options. Training someone with potential can be a lovely journey. I find there are many men who are curious once we get into conversations along that line. And I have learned some do's and don'ts along the way!
DO: Be myself in spirit and soul. Feel comfortable in knowing who I am and let that confidence shine through.
DON'T: Share what all lies in that sexual, sensual heart! They may say they love a strong women, but unless they confess to being submissive and wanting a female dominant, they'll be intimidated that I may know more about control than they do! The thought of surrendering themselves to me sounds enticing at first, but left to their own thoughts, once out of my sight, they'll call foul and feel the security of their masculinity at risk. No matter how much I sense a desire deep within them.
DO: Tell them I'm a writer.
DON'T: Share my stories with them! They say they are big boys and can handle anything. But, again, unless they are part of the D/s world or a reader of Femdom erotica, they'll fold! They make the mistake that I immediately want to do all those things with them! Which is crazy... I'll at least wait until the second date! Just kidding! And this applies to those men who do have D/s experience. Doesn't anyone understand that what they are reading is fiction? Well... mostly fiction, based on my life...but they don't know that! And what I may have eventually with them will have it's own flavor! It's own rhythm and style.
You may be saying I should stick with alternative dating sites. I've tried those in the past before I met NB and they never produced for me. I actually met NB on a vanilla site. But we both had enough in our profiles that drew us to each other. I recently had a profile on 'Collar Me' ... briefly. That proved to be a disappointment for many reasons. People don't seem to read what you carefully put in your profile of what you want and are looking for. I lasted there two weeks!
What do I want? Be honest, accept me that I'm being honest with you and seduce me! I don't care how submissive you are, you still need to chase me, be assertive in wanting me and fucking seduce me!
Let your sexuality show. Be open to me exploring your mind and soul. Push back the fear of not being enough, if that is what it is, and let me revel in your vulnerability. Let me appreciate the beauty that emanates from you and seduce me with the desire you can't hold back. Be confident, be bold, be fearless!
Seduce me!
Tease me!
Entice Me!
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